What in the world have I gotten myself into? I am starting to mentally prepare for Seattle Beer Week – the week where Washington Beer Blog has tasked me with a multitude of venues and events to visit for them, and where I will have to warn my coworkers that I’ll have a 10-day hangover. It begins this Thursday, so bring on the beer!
After a quiet Thursday evening (hopefully) at Naked City Brewery & Taphouse, I am charged Friday (May 20th) with what will likely be the most cringe-worthy of them all – Kulture Freaks at Brouwer’s Cafe in Fremont. Kulture Freaks is sponsored by Shmaltz Brewing Company (makers of He’brew beer and Coney Island Lager), and the evening will begin around 9pm with the live entertainment.
Here’s where it gets cringe-worthy. When I go see live entertainment, it’s usually people dancing around or playing instruments. It’s not usually Donny Vomit, who is headlining Kulture Freaks, and his interesting talents. Don’t get me wrong – I’m excited to see it, but I’m one of those people who puts a hand over my eyes and then cracks my fingers just far enough apart to be traumatized the rest of my life.
Not knowing what I was getting into, I called Brouwer’s for a little more info. Donny Vomit’s show will include sword swallowing, flame throwing, ramming moving drill bits through his nose, and other such mischief. He’ll also hammer a couple of nails through his head. Oh, and this year he’s added something new: running 10,000 volts of electricity through the human body. Fun!
If nails ramming through your head isn’t your thing, perhaps you’ll enjoy one of the opening acts. The show will feature a midget (yes, I checked and that’s the preferred term), hanging from the ceiling, escaping from a straitjacket.
For anyone that hasn’t quite realized the seriousness of this post, I would like to point out that I will be here alone and could use a good-looking, 6’2″ tall man’s arm to cling to as I watch. Volunteers?